Journal MM Day 4

Harini hari keempat buat morning pages. Masih lagi berlegar dengan “I hate..”. Kalini makin deep. Bukan 1-2 tahun kebelakangan ni saja. Goes back 10-20 years ago. I have a lot of “hates” to dig out. Selama ni bila ada hate, aku letak hate tu dalam peti, ikat dengan rantai besi dan mangga besar pastu campak jauh2 dalam lautan subconscious mind aku. Then, gather strength, put up a strong front and face back the world.

It doesn’t work that way.

Satu peti hate tak rasa sangat. Bayangkan 100? 1,000? 10,000? 100,000? 1,000,000? Tak ke semak laut subconscious aku dengan peti hate? Itu yang jadi minda yang menolak wang.

Aku ada tools untuk magnet wang.

Aku ada knowledge magnet wang.

Aku ada cikgu magnet wang.

Yet I can’t get my vibrations right. I just can’t get the mood right. I just can’t get the feeling right.

Nak tak nak, aku kena buat kerahan tenaga. Arahkan pekerja-pekerja otak aku korek balik laut dalam tu, cari peti-peti hate dan shred it to piece.

Shred the hatred to pieces, burn it to ashes and let it follow the wind.

Shred the negativity to pieces and hocus pocus it until it disappear into thin air.

The feeling of its gone? Priceless.

Rasa ringan. Lebih fokus. Idea mudah datang. Rasa pain tu bearable. Rasa masalah tu bearable. Buat apa-apa rasa happy.

Miracles? Dah mula jadi.

Semalam, tiba-tiba Ma belikan aku skirt. After so many years relationship tak berapa smooth dengan dia. Few years ni baru start ok balik. Bila tiba-tiba dia bagi hadiah, it means a lot.

Harini, dok buat kerja lain dalam kelas, bila trainer buat kuiz, ada yang aku jawab salah. Bila soalan last tu aku tertekan sebenarnya and happen that jawapan tu betul pulak. Tiba-tiba dapat nombor 2, dapat hadiah! 😂

To more serendipity in this world and beyond. Amin.

Published by Editor

Storyteller

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